Seems we have a cultural addiction to blamestorming and blamestorm-fixing:
at the first signs of discomfort we look around for the nearest person to blame and discharge our discomfort on them.

We might just yell and  them names and leave it there, realising we’ve just behaved in the exact way that fits the name we just called the other person,

Often, we’ll go a stage further too  into blamestormfixing and issue forth direction in what they need do to fix things right now so we can feel better.

When we stop looking for people to blame
and give up looking for people to fix us
we make it easier for ourselves to find healing,

When we stop looking for others who we can see as needing to be fixed
as needing us to fix them,
as needing our fix,
we make it easier for them to find healing too.

When we find we don’t need to blame
and we don’t need to fix or be fixed
it’s easier to find healing
and easier to just be.